Friday, July 8, 2011

Kobra Kid Reviews: The King in the Window

The King in the WindowThe King in the Window by Adam Gopnik

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I really wish Goodreads allowed half-star ratings, because I just don't think four stars are adequate to indicate how much I truly enjoyed this book. The King in the Window is a wonderful, imaginative work of children's literature, and I honestly can't believe it doesn't seem to be more popular. I had never even heard of it, myself; I only discovered it by accident while going through the books my aunt had set aside for charity. The title caught my eye first, of course, so I read the first page to see if it sounded like the sort of thing I'd be interested in and I thought, hey, this seems like it could be fun, I should read it before we give it away. And I'm so glad I did, too, because it turned out to be even better than I expected.

The story is about Oliver, an American boy stuck in Paris, who has few friends: Neige, the older girl with whom he is in love, but who is currently not speaking to him; Charlie, who is separated from him by an ocean; and the mysterious Zindaine, who is mentioned but never seen. Oliver attends a rigorous French école, where he does poorly because he doesn't understand his demanding coursework. He is ridiculed by his classmates and treated badly by his strict teachers. And he even feels isolated at home. He is infantilized by his mother, who spends so much time running away from her problems at home that she can't see Oliver is growing up. His father, on the other hand, seems to be standing still; a journalist who has become obsessed with the exclusive that could be the break he needs, he has withdrawn from his family and become a shadow haunting his office and staring into the computer for hours.

This is the lonely and depressing existence Oliver leads. Until the night of Epiphany, that is, when he suddenly becomes the King of Windows and Water through a series of accidents. Or so he thinks, at first. That's one of the things I enjoyed most about this book: the quality of Gopnik's foundation-building and the subtlety of his foreshadowing. Unlike most authors of children's novels, who tend to lay everything out in front of you and give you all the information you need as quickly as possible, holding only one or two things back, Gopnik instead plays his cards close to the vest, and every time you think you're starting to figure things out, he throws something else on the table and shakes things up again. Details that were mentioned earlier in the book, but that you didn't pay much attention to at the time, turn up again later on and end up being more important than ever. It's a method that makes for an ever-evolving and unpredictable story that keeps you guessing right up to the very end, and it is awesome. I love it when I can't put a book down because I can't wait to find out what happens next.

But this book is more than just a lot of fun; it's also educational. While kids are reading about Oliver saving the world from the Master of Mirrors, they can also learn a little about French culture, a little French history, a little of the language, and even a little bit about quantum theory. Along the way on his journey, Oliver visits the Louvre, Versailles, Sainte-Chapelle, and the Eiffel Tower. He meets Molière, Racine, and the Duc de Richelieu. He learns about quanta, about multiverse theory, and also about important distinctions in language: the difference between irony and sarcasm, simile and metaphor, and rhetoric. Important stuff for a kid to learn about, considering there are so many adults who don't even understand things like irony. (Hint: it's not like rain on your wedding day.)

I think the best thing about this book, however, is the message, which I think can be summed up by these two paragraphs:

...Seeing Charlie's face, newly lit with courage, Oliver knew at last what the golden lie was that Mrs. Pearson had promised to tell him about when he was ready. The golden lie was the greatest lie of all--it was the lie you told others about your own courage, in order to make them courageous. And what made it golden, Oliver saw, was that it was shiny, reflective. Your pretending to be brave when you weren't made other people braver than they really were--and their bravery bounced back on you, as Charlie's was doing now, and made you brave. The golden lie was the lie of courage when you didn't have it, which meant that you did, which made you brave.

He found his crown on the floor and, tattered and creased as the paper was by now, he put it on. He understood that to be a king at all it is necessary to act like a king even if you do not feel like a king, and that to be a good king you must first accept your crown, and wear it proudly, come what may. Courage is measured in what you do, not how you feel. Everyone is always afraid. The brave, he knew now, just lie about it better than the rest of us.


Now, some people may object, claiming that this encourages kids to lie. But I disagree, and frankly, I think to say that is to entirely miss the point. What this teaches is not that it's okay to lie, or that some lies are good, or whatever. After all, by the time a kid is old enough to read this book, they're old enough to have already learned that there is a difference between bad lies ("No, Mom, I didn't steal $20 from your purse") and acceptable lies ("No, Mom, that dress doesn't make you look fat"). Rather, what it teaches is this:

Courage isn't something you're born with. It's not something you gain magically, or that comes to you when you learn to stop being afraid. It's not something that some people have and other people don't. Anybody can be brave. Any old kid looking out his (or her!) window can be a king; you don't have to be extraordinary to change the world. All you need is to care about something enough to want to make a difference.

An important message, I think, and one that's far better than the messages kids are picking up from the television every day.

So I suppose it stands to question, if I feel so strongly about this book, why I don't just go ahead and give it five stars. And the thing is, as much as I enjoyed it, I definitely feel there were parts of the story that could have been explained better. There were certain concepts, particularly toward the end of the book, that were not necessarily hard to comprehend so much as they were hard to visualize. Now, I understand that Gopnik was probably trying to control the word count on what is already a rather lengthy children's novel (416 pages, as opposed to the 350 or less that is more common, in my experience). However, if I, as an adult, have trouble following or picturing certain aspects of a story, then imagine how the book's intended audience must feel.

Also, frankly, the very end was pretty sloppy. First of all, by the end of the story, Oliver has been running around Paris for, what, three days without checking in with his parents? His father may have known what he was up to, but since neither of them bothered informing Oliver's mother, why didn't she say anything about it? Am I the only one whose mother would have had several litters of kittens and at least one entire cow had I gone gallivanting around a major city--or any city--at the age of twelve without showing my face at home for three days? Especially after I'd already been caught lying to her about where I'd been and skipping school. My mother would not have given the barest fraction of a shit whether I'd been in the company of some famous, award-winning author, or even the President of the United States himself; if she had found out I'd cut school without her express permission, she would have shot fire out of her nostrils! No joke. And I find it a bit too unbelievable that Oliver's mother didn't have a similar reaction.

Furthermore, speaking of mothers, at the end of the book, Neige's mother is...well, I don't want to have to put a spoiler warning on this, so let's just say she's out of ambit. (Bonus points for Young Wizards reference, y/y?) And since Neige doesn't have a father, that means she's on her own until she can get her mother back, if she can get her mother back, and who knows how long that will take. Does anyone else see the problem with a thirteen-year-old girl being on her own for an indefinite period of time? Does France not have a social services department? Tsk-tsk, Mr. Gopnik, a silly and avoidable oversight.

It's for these reasons that I cannot, in good conscience, give this book a full five stars. However, I do not think that this should at all deter people from reading it.

The King in the Window is inspired and imaginative in a way that reminds me strongly of Neil Gaiman in his ability to create worlds within worlds and to make it believable. Despite being a children's novel, and though it is unequivocally a work of fantasy, The King... is a strikingly credible story about an ordinary boy who does something extraordinary. It's fun, and it's touching, and it's exciting, and it's funny, all in a way that I think should make it enjoyable for readers of all ages.


Kobra Kid, signing off.
[You can't stop the signal.]

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Sunday, June 26, 2011

Angel Reviews: Z for Zachariah

Z for ZachariahZ for Zachariah by Robert C. O'Brien

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


My 15 year old daughter recommended this book for me, and to be honest i was scared to read it. You see my daughter normally reads things like Twilight..and I am very sorry but, that's just not my cup of tea AT ALL! So I opened this book with a lot or trepidation.

This book was amazing. I read it in something like 3 hours from cover to cover. I could not put it down. Very suspenseful! I can see why it was part of her school curriculum. It is well worth the read, not only for the story but also for the life lesson it teaches. I think everyone should read this book.



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Angel Reviews: The Dream Crystal (The Dream War Series, #1)

The Dream Crystal (The Dream War Series, #1)The Dream Crystal by Mark O'Bannon

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


It took me longer than I thought it would to finish this book. this is no fault of the authors, just due to life in general. So I apologize for this review coming so late!



This was a good read. Well written and very descriptive and intriguing. One problem I did have was, from the very beginning it grabbed my attention. However, about halfway through it seemed to drag a bit, thankfully a little while later the plot picked up speed again.



Also, I realize this is a YA and I think maybe that's why I didn't relate to the characters very well, I can see my daughter (15) relating to these people though , they were very giggly and a bit materialistic at times, but then again aren't most teens?



The fantasy story itself was what saved it for me. The world the author created was full of imagery and twists and it was very very captivating. I love stories like this but based on more mature charecters.



This does not mean the book was bad cause it was NOT it was just not what I would call age appropriate for ME.



I recommend this for young teen boys and girls who like sci-fi , fantasy and magic!









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Monday, June 20, 2011

Kobra Kid Reviews: Duma Key

Duma KeyDuma Key by Stephen King

My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Excuse me, Mr. King, but what the hell is this?

Jesus, what a mess. Duma Key is the worst Stephen King book I've read since Lisey's Story. In fact, I'm pretty sure it's even worse than Lisey's Story, because while that book was, frankly, retarded and had the absolute WORST plot resolution of any book EVER, it at least had the benefit of suspense. There was a clear and present danger throughout, there was a recognizable Bad Guy (along with a few other things that go bump in the night, as you would expect from Stephen King), and even more important than the fact that you had at least a vague notion of where all this was going was the fact that you could be almost entirely sure that it was going somewhere. In other words, it was what a thriller should be, at least in that respect. Duma Key, on the other hand, was...about a dude painting.

No, really.

This Freemantle dude gets maimed in an industrial accident, moves to Florida, and paints a bunch of pictures. Oh, and he meets this guy who speaks Spanglish even though he's a white dude from, like, Omaha or somewhere, and also an old lady with Alzheimer's. Aaand...yeah, that's about all that happens for almost four hundred pages; Freemantle paints, and everyone is just amazed by how good he is. You only faintly have a sense that some weird shit is going on, and that mostly just because it's freakin' Stephen King, come on. Nothing scary or even particularly interesting happens until about two-thirds of the way through the book, when some fucking creepy undead kids finally show up to scare the bejeezus out of this asshole. Unfortunately, that still doesn't save the reader the horror of what comes next.

Edgar's Big Damn Art Show.

Oh lord.

Maybe I just have no stomach for a bunch of over-educated, over-privileged, pontificating, pretentious fucks standing around jerking each other off over art--or anything, actually--but the whole thing was nigh on painful for me, particularly when Elizabeth showed up and everyone was lauding the Great Patron of the Arts, and then she started giving this horrible, stilted, over-the-top art critique. Ugh. I was actually, literally rolling my eyes by that point. I mean, it all struck me as the sort of thing you'd find in some horrendous dime-store novel, the author of which clearly wishes this would happen to him or her, and who has always dreamed of being the recipient of this brand of exaggerated praise and adoration. Gross. I expect better of you, Stephen.

After that, the real story finally gets underway and King starts elucidating his convoluted plot. Like he could have done TWO HUNDRED FUCKING PAGES AGO. Seriously. And I could have excused the amount of time and unnecessary word-count it took to get there, because I feel like King could have salvaged the book at that point, but instead he chose the single STUPIDEST method of exposition EVER. EVER. And that's what pisses me off more than anything else about this book, to be honest; Duma Key COULD have been good. Perhaps not great, but it could have been pretty damn interesting. A casual inspection of the copyright page reveals the band Shark Puppy as consisting of R. Tozier and W. Denbrough. As in Richie and Bill of the Losers Club. A clear nod, I should think, to the idea that Perse is of a similar nature to Pennywise, the Awful Monster of Awfulness from It. It is one of my very favorite King novels, though I feel there was room for more explanation about the origins and nature of Pennywise, so I was extremely disappointed by what I see as a missed opportunity here to get really meta and expatiate on an existing mythology.

So, in short, unless you're a hardcore Stephen King fan, I would steer clear of this one. The writing isn't up to King's usual quality, and considering that, in most of the book, nothing happens, and the rest of the book is blindingly stupid exposition, Duma Key isn't worth your time.


Kobra Kid, signing off.
[You can't stop the signal.]

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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Kobra Kid Reviews: Why Is Murder On The Menu, Anyway?

Why Is Murder On The Menu, Anyway? (Harlequin Next)Why Is Murder On The Menu, Anyway? by Stevi Mittman

My rating: 1 of 5 stars

I picked this up and started reading it before I realized that it was freakin' Harlequin. Oy. Definitely not my cup of tea. But the first page and a half or so seemed rather amusing, so I kept reading, because hey, I'm not such a book snob that I can't try new things sometimes. I like to keep an open mind. Unfortunately, my mind isn't so open that I could keep reading past the first chapter. The problem is this: the book reads more like an outline than a novel. I can't understand how Mittman sent this in to her editor and actually got it published. How do these things happen? I mean, it's got potential, yes, and it's funny, but it requires a lot more fleshing out before it can call itself anything more than a rough draft.


Kobra Kid, signing off.
[You can't stop the signal.]

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Friday, June 10, 2011

Kobra Kid Reviews: Book of Dreams

Book of DreamsBook of Dreams by Jack Kerouac

My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I have a confession to make: I didn't enjoy On the Road quite as much as everyone else seemed to enjoy On the Road. I'm not sure whether it's because people had forever been telling me how oh-my-god-amazing it is, and thus I went into it with really high expectations--too high, in fact--or if it's because I'm just not a fan of Kerouac's style. Either way, I'm sure it makes me a terrible person, but there it is.

So it begs the question why I didn't simply pass on by when I spotted Book of Dreams on the shelf while raiding my local library. The thing is, I love the idea of other people's dreams. They fascinate me. Myself, I dream almost exclusively about people who never were and places that don't exist, or places to which I've never been (which amounts to about the same, in the end), whereas other people tend to dream about those around them, their loved ones, about the things going on in their lives. They dream about their hopes and their fears and their desires. To experience another person's dream is like having a window into their soul.

Book of Dreams does indeed offer the reader a window into the very private world inside the mind of Jack Kerouac. (Or not so private, perhaps, all things considered.) But that's about all the book can boast, unfortunately. One would expect someone's dreams to be written in stream-of-consciousness or similar style, naturally, but this goes right past SOC into a poorly punctuated, run-on, rambling mess that is extremely hard to follow. Reading it actually gave me headaches until I realized that the trick is to skim through the lines really quickly and just get the gist of the material. Focus on the shape of things, the feeling of it, not the finer details.

Because of this, however, I only really learned two things from this book:

1) Jack had a lot of dreams about failed or abortive trysts with women.

2) Jack had a lot of dreams about queers. (His word, not mine.)

Paging Dr. Freud...

So anyway. Unless you're a dedicated Kerouac fan, or really into dreams and dream interpretation--even more so than I am, that is--I would recommend leaving this one on the shelf. If you must, read On the Road instead; it's about basically the same exact stuff, except it makes more sense, is marginally less rambling, and is easier to follow.


Kobra Kid, signing off.
[You can't stop the signal.]

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Thursday, June 9, 2011

Angel Reviews: A Shot of Poison by: Christopher Long

A Shot of Poison: An Insider's Tales of One of Rock's Most Outrageous BandsA Shot of Poison: An Insider's Tales of One of Rock's Most Outrageous Bands by Christopher Long

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


This book was for me, a blast from the past. Having lived my life around the "rock star scene" since the age of 15, nothing I read really surprised me...much.



I expected to find out that every guy in Poison could be an asshole on any given day but also that each one had very very endearing points. I think some people: the die hard "My favorite band is ultimate perfection in every way" crowd, may actually be offended by the God's honest truth the writer spouts.



Does he talk smack? Well yeah, he does. But. knowing the scene as well as I do from years as a wanna-be groupie, I believe every word written in this memoir.



If you're looking for sordid tales of sexual debauchery and drug abuse and just flat out mayhem, this book is not for you. If you are looking for a book that shows you the not so glamorous side of the road, the harsh truths of how chaotic and emotionally and physically draining it is for not only the band but the road crew as well, then I suggest giving this a read.



Chris Long shows the band in a very human light, imperfect, egotistical at times but yet very very HUMAN.





I thoroughly enjoyed this book, and will probably read it again and again.











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